Science Unfolds what NATURE Holds

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Afterword: Putting Mindpower into Perspective

There are two final points which are worth stressing:

MindPower is NOT an alternative to orthodox medicine. It will NOT replace medical treatment. There will always be a place for doctors and healers; they are needed as technicians, to be called as aides and assistants in the fight for good health and happiness.
Mindpower is essentially a philosophy designed for the individual. It offers an oppurtinity for you, the reader, to take the charge of your own life, to look after your own medical destiny and to take back some some of the responsibility which has, in recent years, been taken from you by traditional interventionists.

There will be no Mindpower clinics, no Mindpower products, and no Mindpower practitioners. Mindpower is an idea, an approach and a philosophy of life. It is a book. No more and no less.

Part Two 2: Mindpower in Practice

Mental Self-Defence

Here are the practical examples of how the principles of Mindpower can be used.

Although you can use Mindpower to help you deal with well over 90% and all symptoms and diseases, there are obviously problems which do need interventionist help.

Accidents
Anxiety and Depression
Arthritis
Asthma
Cancer
Colds and influenza
Convalescence
Diabetes
Eczema and Dermatitis
Headaches
Heart Disease
High blood pressure
Indigestion
Inferitility
Menopausal problem
Menstrual problems
Migrane
Overweight
Pain
Phobias
Pregnancy
Sexual problems
Sleeplessness
Smoking

8. Knowing your own mind

Questionnaires designed to help you decide how to make the best possible use of of your personal strengths, how best to conquer your weaknesses and how to use the Mindpower techniques which are likely to be most useful to you.

Do you let enough of laughter in your life? (answer them "yes" or "no")

Do you find it difficult to laugh at yourself?
Do you get cross if you are in an important meeting and someone starts to tell a joke or funny story?
Would you be deeply offended if you did something silly and people laughed at you?
Do you orefer watching serious documentaries to light comedy films?
Do you think your position or status means that you need to behave in a serious manner when in public?
Do you think cartoon books and comic magazines are a waste of time?
Do you think that sex and humour should be kept apart?
Would you be embarrased to laugh out loud in a hospital or church?
Do you think that practical jokes are invariably childish?
Dp you think the people who laugh a lot are immature?

Answers "yes" to 4 or fewer questions=> humour plays a sensible part in your life.
"Yes" to 5 or more questions=> there is probably too little laughter in your life.
Laughter can offer protection as well as provide a healing force.

Has your life got purpose?

Do you feel that something is slacking in your life?
Are you frequently bored?
Do you have any unfulfilled ambition?
Do you wish you had more responsibility?
Do you sometimes think that you are wasting your life?
Are you doing what you dreamt of doing when you were 18years old?
Do you look forward to the future?
Do you wish you were extended more often?
Have you got any talent or skills which are not fully employed?
Are you proud of your achievements?

YES: 1 points; NO: 0 points
YES: 1 points; NO: 0 points
YES: 0 points; NO: 1 points
YES: 1 points; NO: 0 points
YES: 1 points; NO: 0 points
YES: 0 points; NO: 1 points
YES: 0 points; NO: 1 points
YES: 1 points; NO: 0 points
YES: 1 points; NO: 0 points
YES: 0 points; NO: 1 points

Scores: 7-10 => you definitely need more purpose in life.
Scores: 4-6 => you are not so dangerously short of satisfaction.
Scores: 3 or les s=> your life is rich in purpose and you seem likely to satisfy some if not all of your ambitions. Atleast you will have tried.

Are you floating on Optimism - or sunk by Pessimism?

Do you ever bet?
Do you ever dream about what you would do if you suddenly came into a large sum of money?
Do you routinely carry a safety pin with you in case something breaks?
If you heard a knowck on the door late at night, would you asssume that it meant either bad news or trouble of some work?
You get a valentine card but you don't know who it is from. would yo assume that it was a joke from a friend rather than a message from an unknown admirer?
Would you ever go away without making hotel reservation before hand?
Do you regularly spend money on insurance of one sort or another?
When you're going out, do you always carry a macintosh or umbrella?
If your doctor arranged for you to see a hospital consultant, would you assume that something serious must be wrong?
Would you catchon earlier train than necessary if you had an important appointment?

YES: 1 point; NO: 0 point
YES: 1 point; NO: 0 point
YES: 0 point; NO: 1 point
YES: 0 point; NO: 1 point
YES: 0 point; NO: 1 point
YES: 1 point; NO: 0 point
YES: 0 point; NO: 1 point
YES: 0 point; NO: 1 point
YES: 0 point; NO: 1 point
YES: 0 point; NO: 1 point

Scores:
7-10 => You are an absolute optimist. Your approach to life should ensure that your health is not adversely affected by your attitude towards minor problems and troubles. (Although you should be aware that if your attitude becomes too cavelier, you could find yourself in tremendous trouble one day).

4 or less => You are an absolute pessimist. Your approach to life will probably affect your health adversely and you should try to modify your natural pessimistic feelings.

4, 5, 6 => You are fairly well balanced but you could undoubtedly enhance your health by learning how to deal with your ups and downs in a more optimistic way.

Are you so cool that your that you health is suffering?

Do you love someone you love atleast once everyday?
Do you enjoy physical signs of affection?
Do you regularly tell those you love just how you feel about them?
Do you enjoy being kissed and hugged by people you love?
Do you dislike sleeping alone?
Have you ever had a pet of which you were very fond?
Do you enjoy being massaged?
Would you happily hold hand in public with someone you care for?
Do you think women should be encouraged to breastfeed babies in public?
Do you ever get broody when you see small babies?

Scores:
less than 5 => you are rather cool individual and you should take efforts to allow yourself to care for others. You should try to let yourself show your affection without feelinf guilty or embarrassed.

5 or more => you are already a very caring person with few problems in the area.

Have you got your priorities right?
There are no right or wrong answers, but they will help you learn a great deal about your ability to differentiate between important things in your life and the trivia.

Do you know what things are important in your life?
Do you always make sure that those things take precedence over other areas of your life?
Do yoou find it easy to delegate responsibility for minor problems?
Do you ever waste time worrying about the trivial problems?
How far would you go to protect or further the priorities in your life?
What things in your life gave you the greatest happiness?
What things in your life makes you most miserable?
How much time do you spend on those things that give you happiness?
How much time do you spend on those things that make you miserable?
Which individuals contribute most to your happiness?
Which individuals contribute most to your unhappiness?
How much time do you spend with the people you care about the most?
How much time do you spend with the people you don't really like?
How much time do you spend enjoying yourself?
How important is money to you?
How much time do you spend making money?
How important is your work?
How much time do you spend worrying about your work?
How important to you are your possessions?
How much time do you spend making money to buy possessions?
How important ae your hobbies?
How much time do you spend on your hobbies?
What is your most important ambition?
How would you best improve the quality of your life?
What priorities do the people who are close yo you have?

Do you need to assert yourself more?
(Answer 'yes' or 'no', add up total number of 'yes' points.)

Do you ever find yourself accepting invitations that you would really rather turn down?
Do you sit on any committees that you consider to be a waste of time?
Do you ever go out to dinner or to see friends when you would rather have a quite evening at home?
Would you feel gulity if you let the telephone ring without answering it?
Have you ever lent anyone money or (or anything else) because you didn't like to say 'no'?
When watching television, do you invariably end up watching what someone else wants to watch?
If a waiter was rude to you, would yyou put up with his behaviour rather than complain?
Do you ever buy things that you don't really want because you don't like to disappoint the salesman?
Do you ever take holidays in places you don't really like?
Do you ever spend Christmas with people you don't get on with particularly well?

Score:
7-10 points => your lack of confidence is very likely to be having an adverse effect on your health. You need to assert yourself more and take greater control on your life.
3-6 points => You still probably need to assert yourself a little more.
2 or fewer => you are unlikely to need advice on how to assert.

Do you have healthy attitude towards crying?

Do you feel guilty if you cry in public?
Do you think that crying is usually a sign of weakness?
Do you think that boys should be encouraged to hide their tears?
Do you feel embarrased if you cry while watching a film or reading a book with a sensitive theme?
Would you try to hold back your tears if you attending a funeral or some other sad events?
Would you distrust a leader who shed tears in public?
Would you pretend that you had something in your eye if you were unexpectedly discovered crying?
Do you get embarrassed if you see grown men crying?
Would you allow someone to comfort you if you were found crying?
Do you think tears are an unnecessary expression of emotion?

Score:
3 or more => Your attitude to crying is not healthy.
Crying is a natural response and suppressing tears is storing up of the trouble for yourself.

Is anger damaging your health?

Do you always try to hide your anger?
Do you tend to stay angry for long periods of time?
Does your temper ever get out of control?
Do you suffer from physical symptoms (headaches, stomach pains, etc) when you are angry?
Do you always try to resist the temptation to complain if you are angry about something?
do you get cross quite often?
Do you tend to brood about things which have make you angry?
Do you have difficulty in getting to sleep after something has annoyed you?
Does your face go red (white) when you are angry?
Do you have ever got into trouble because of your anger?

Scores:
7-10 => You do need to learn to control your anger.
4-6 => Anger is likely to produce problem
3 or less => Anger is unlikely to be a major force in your life, nor it is likely to cause you any physical or mental damage.

Do you need to be ill?

Do you suffer from any symptom which disappear and reappear at apperantly irregular and unexpected interval?
do you have any long term medical problem for which your doctor has been unable to find any explanation?
When you were small, did you ever use any physical symptom of any kind to enable you to stay away from school?
Have you ever felt secretely pleased when you've developed an illness which has enabled you to avoid some unpleasant social event?
When you were ill as a child, did your mother did a tremendous fuss of you?
Do you enjoy being looked after when you are ill?
Do you regularly have to miss important but unpleasant appointments through ill health?
Do you unvariably develop mild physical symptoms (nausea, diarrhoea, muscular pain, etc) when you are under pressure or stress?
Has anyone ever accused you of malingering?
Do you tend to retire to your bed if you are upset, worried or anxious?

Score: 'yes' points
7 or more => It is very likely that you (probably unconsciously) regularly use symptoms of ill health to enable you to avoid unpleasant confrontation or threatening experiences. The real problem in using ill health in this way is that you are never likely to get healthy as long as you need your illness.
4-7 => it is possible that you use ill health as a weapon.
3 or fewer => it is unlikely that you use ill health as a weapon.

Do you need more excitement in your life?

Do you think you are in a rut?
Do you regularly get bored?
Do you wish that you had more responsibility?
Do yo regularly spend time operating machinery over which you have little or no control?
Do you usually know what you are going to do each day?
Do your partners habits regularly get on your nerves?
Does television provides most of the highlights in your life?
Is your partner totally predictable in your bed?
Do you wish there were more surprises in your life?
Do you envy people who live exciting life?

Scores: 'Yes' points
7-10 => You are suffering badly from boredom. You desperately need to add excitement in your life.
4-6 => Boredom is a fairly major driving force affecting your health. Do something o combat your boredom.
3 or less => boredom is unlikely to play important partt in your life.

Do you need to be more self-confident?

Do you usually avoid doing things that might upset other people - even if there are things you would like to do?
Do you feel bad if you go into shop and come out without having bought anything?
Do you invariably dress to please other people?
Do you spend a lot of your life doing things that you don't enjoy?
Do you feel guilty if you really enjoy yourself?
Do you let other people run your life for you?
Do you think that you have far more weakness than strengths?
Do you worry a lot if you accidently upset other people?
Do you regularly find yourself apologising to other people?
Do you often find yourself wishing that you had more skills and talents?

Score: 'Yes' points
7-10 => You are desperately in need of more confidence. Your lack of self-confidence is undoubtedly havinf an adverse effect on your health.
3-6 => It is stil quite likely that your lack of self-confidence is afecting your health
2 or less => Your health is unlikely to be damaged by lack of confidence you may feel

How do your Relationship with others affect your health?
Make a list of all the people with whom you have close and important relationships.
Beginning with the top name on your list, answer the questions that follows.
Repeat the questions foe each individual on your list.
Answers to your questions will help you to understand your relationships withh others a little better.

Who is the stronger partner in yoour relationship?
Do you tend to lean on him/her a great deal?
Does he/she end to lean on you a great deal?
Do you tend to take him/her for granted a good deal?
Does he/she tend to take you for granted?
Can you always rely on him/her when you need help?
Can he/she rely on you when he/she needs help?
Does he/she ever intimidate or frighten you?
Do you think you ever intimidate or frighten him/her?
Is he/she dependent on you for money?
Are you dependent on him/her for money?
Would you trust him/her with money or important possessions?
Do you think he/she would trust you with money or important possessions?
Do you like him/her?
Do you love him/her?
Do you think he/she likes you?
Do you think he/she loves you?
What you gain from your relationship?
What does he/she gain from your relationship?
Do you always talk kindly about him/her when he/she not present?
Do you think he/she always talk kindly about you when you are absent?
What are his/her greatest ambitions?
What are his/her greatest fears?
What do you think is the most important thing in his/her life?
If your car broke down at 3 in the morning, would you be able to ring him/her and ask for help?
If his/her car broke down at 3 in the morning, would he/she be able to ring you and ask for help?
Does he/she benefit financially from your relationship?
Do you benefit financially fro your relationship?
What annoys you most about him/her?
What do you think annoys him/her most about you?

There are no correct answers to these questions. But if you think about your answers carefully, you may find that you may learn something about your relationship with and your attitudes to other people.

How Tranquil are you?
(To find out how vulnerable is your mind to stress and pressure)
Answer 'yes' or 'no'
Add up all 'yes'

Do you get easily irritated?
Do you ever suffer from panic attacks?
Do you find it difficult to relax?
Do you wish you had less responsibility?
Do you find yourself getting frustrated a good deal?
Do you need a tranquilisers or sleeping tablets to help you deal with stress or pressure?
Do you ever feel like packing it all in and running away?
Do you ever suffer from any symptoms which are caused by or made worse by pressure?
Do you describe yourself as a "worrier"?
Do you always seem to be in a hurry?

Scores:
7-10 => You would benefit enormously from learning how to relax your mind. You are extremely susceptible to stress, pressure, anxiety and worry.
4-6 => You are far less susceptible to worry and stress, But you would still benefit from learning how to relax your mind.
3 or less => You are fairly strong. But you might still benefit from studying the pages dealing with tranquility.

How physically tense are you?
(How vulnerable is your bodyto stress and pressures.)
Answer 'yes' or 'no'
Add up all 'yes'

When you are excited , do you ever have difficulty in breathing or do you ever wheeze?
When you are angry, does your face ever go red?
When you are frightened or anxious, do yo sweat?
Do you ever get butterflies in your stomach?
do you ever suffer from palpitation when you are anxious or upset?
Do you ever suffer from vomitting or diarrhoea before important occasions?
Does your pulse ever raise when you are excited?
Do you ever develop a rash when you are excited or nervous?
do you ever get headaches when you are worried?
Have you ever fainted when you've been frightened?

Scores:
7-10 => your body is particularly susceptible to stress and pressure.
3-6 => average
2 or fewer => you are less vulnerable than most individuals to physical problems produced by stress.

How well developed is your imagination?
'yes' or 'no'

Do you dream while you are asleep?
Did you ever daydream as a child?
Have you ever had a nightmare?
Do you ever fantasise about people you know or about film stars or celebrities?
Have you ever had a feeling of "deja vu"? (Thinking that you have been somewhere before, when in reality it is your first visit.?)
Do you ever fantasise when making love?
Do you have any strong religious beliefs?
do you ever get frightened when watching horror movies?
Do you ever wonder what it would have been like to live in a different centuary?
Do you ever worry about your loved ones' safety when they are travelling?

The more times you answeres 'yes', the greater the power of your imagination. But as long as you answered 'yes' atleast once, your imagination is powerful enough to be used as a healing force.

How strong is your sense of intuition?

Do you tend to do well in guessing games?
Have you ever had a long run of good luck when gambling?
Have you ever had bad dreams which turned out to be true?
Have you ever known what was in a letter before opening it?
Have you ever thought about someone you haven't heard from and then out of blue, received a telephone call, postcard or letter from them? Or met them unexpectedly in the street?
Do you ever know what people are going to say it?
Have you ever heard voices telling you what to do?
Have you ever known who was on the other end before picking up a ringing telephone?
Have you ever felt that a house was right for you the moment you saw it?
Have you ever felt that you wanted to know someone better after seeing them for no more than instant?

If you answered yes to atleast one question, you have intuitive powers that you could use to your advantage. The greater your scores, the greater your powers.

7. Mindpower Techniques

Tranquillity

Many of us find it difficult to reduce the amount of information pouring into our minds because we feel guilty if we slow down. we feel that we are failing ourselves and those around us if we sit and watch the world go by for a minute or two. We have been conditioned to think that only by pushing ourselves as hard as possible will we ever achieve anything worthwhile or win the respect of those around us.

Pressured by exppectations, we are always in a hurry, rushing from crisis to crisis and struggling to cram as much as we possibly can into every moment of our lives. We rush through life at top speed, making ourselves ill by pushing ourselves so hard, and failing to gain any real pleasure from the thiings we do because we are doing them so quickly.

There are few places as peaceful and relaxing as graveyeards.

Most of us day dream when we are small. But our teachers and our parents teach us that it is wasteful, undesirable habit that we must lose. in fact, it isn't bad habit at all. It is, on the contrary, a natural technique which can help you relax your mind thoroughly and achieve a beneficial level of tranquility even when things around you are just as hectic as ever.

When you daydream, you uuse a cut-out process which your mind has available but which it has forgotten how to use. To daydream effectively you have to allow your imagination to dominate your thinking and to take over your body too.

Start by finding somwhere comfortable to lie down. your bedroom is probably the best place. Close the door and lock it if you can. Put a 'Do Not Disturb' notice on the outside door handle. Before you go into your room, by the way, take the telephone off the hook, put the cats out and make sure that there isn't anyone due to call or arrive home for 15 or 20 minutes or so.

Now lie down on your back and make yourself as comfortable as you can get. Take big deep breaths and try to conjure up some particularly restful and relaxing scenes from your past. Don't let anyone else wander in your daydream, beacuse if you do, the chances are that your daydream will either become a fantasy or a nightmare.

Daydream One

Imagine that you are in a dressing gown, lying down on a large soft, four-poster bed in a country hotel. Above your head, the bed is hung with a brocade canopy made of a rich red and gold material. Matching curtains hang at all four corners of the bed and are tied back with red ropes, knotted neatly into bows. The room is panelled in oak and there is one window on your right. It is an old-fashioned metal lattice-work windows with thick, red velvet curtains hanging on each side of it. through the windows you can see a corner of a peaceful, typically English country garden and beyond, in the distance, there are pleasant acres of rolling countryside. In front of the windows, there is a long window seat covered in material that matches the curtains.

To your left as you lie on the bed there is a door. This is almost impossible to distinguish from the walls, being made by the exactly same sort of panelled oak. A large key protrudes from the lock and a bolt has been drawn as an added security.

You don't know what the weather is like outside, but in your bedroom it is warm and cosy. Directly in front of your bed, there is a large open fireplace and a wood fire is crackling away. The fire itself look solid enough to last for several ours, but there is a huge pile of fresh logs stacked neatly in the hearth.

Your eyes are closed as you lie back on your bed, but you can hear the crackle of the fire and feel its warmth. Outside you can hear the birds, and a few farmyard animals in the distance. A gentle breeze plays with the tops of the nearby trees. There is a faint smell of woodsmoke in the room.

You lie back, drifting comfortably into a sleepy sort of state and knowing that you have nothing to do for several hours. You've had a fairly tiring morning walking through the countryside and your damp outdoor clothes are all being dried downstairs. You've had lunch and had a bath and several hours to go before dinner. The hotel staff who are looking after you are quite, caring and considerate. They obviously feel well-disposed to you and you know that your evening is going to be peaceful and enjoyable. You have nothing to do but rest, doze and drift peacefully and calmly into a sleepy and relaxing state of mind.

Daydream Two

Imagine that you are lying on a warm, sunny each. It is a mid-summmer day and yet the beach is quite deserted. In the distance to your right and to your left, there are one or two families scattered around and you can here the faint sound of children playing. Infront of you the waves were breaking gently on the soft sand and behind you a slight breeze rustles through the long grasses growing in the sand dunes. High above, you ca hear seagulls calling to one another as they circle overhead. They and the far-off children are the only sounds that disturb the peace and tranquility of the afternoon.

The most insistent sensation is, however, that of warmth. The sand underneath you is warm on your skin. You've oiled yourself carefully with sun lotion and can smell it still. If you opened your eyes, you'd be able to see your skin glistening in the sunshine. But the sun is bright on your eyelids and you don't want to open your eyes just yet. Still and peacefull, you soak up the sun and enjoy the afternoon warmth. (If you find it difficult to create this scene, try using a sunlamp to stimulate the warmth of the sun and a sound effects record the sound of the sea.)

Daydream Three

Imagine that you are lying back on a grassy bank by the side of a slow-moving stream. It is a clear, fresh stream with the pebbles that make up its base clearly visible through the bright water. As the stream meanders along, you can hear the sound it makes rippling sound over the pebbles. You can hear birds up above you in the branches of a huge oak tree. You can hear insects in the fields behind you and in the field across the field the stream you can hear the accasional sheep. High in the sky there are birds circling, but you cannot see you cannot see them for the sun is too bright for you to open your eyes. It is a warm, relaxing summer sun and the gentle coolness of the grassy bank on which you lie makes a pleasant contrast.

---------

Daydreaming has got one important advantsge over the type of meditation favoured by some doctors and many religious groups. With meditation you have to empty your mind completely and replace real anxieties and troubles with a clinically, empty, clean space. That isn't easy thing to do. When you day dream, you replace your natural fears wiith calming, comfortable, tranquil memories, which do themselves have a useful and a positive effect. Meditation does undoubtedly halt the damage caused by he pressures of the outside world. When you feel the void instead with peaceful, tranquil thoughts, you don't just halt the damage - you do much more. You can build up your inner strength by filling your mind with positive, health-giving feelings. Once you have learned how to day-dream properly, you will be able to use the same technique just about wherever you are and whatever you are doing. if you're stuck in a traffiic jam, for example, and you feel yyour heart rate rising and your muscles tensing, just lie back and get as comfortable as you can. Close your eyes, and imagine that you are on your beach or in your country hotel. replace the real fears and frustrations of the world around you with the relaxing feelings and memories of a scene that you find soothing and calming.

Incidentally, if you do want to prove to yourself just how useful this techinique can be, take your pulse when you start a daydreaming sessionand then take your pulse again, when you finish. You'll almost certainly find that your pulse rate will fall noticeably during a 10 or 15 min day dream session.

Try not to make this a routine test, however. It is all too easy to turn a relaxation technique into a competitive exercise. You won't benefit from this technique if you end up trying to ge your pulse rate lower and lower and worrying about the natural variations in your heart rate.

Finally, a word of warning. When you have relaxed, don't get up suddenly. If you have relaxed efficiently, your blood pressure will havve fallen fairly considerably. And if you do get up too quickly, you will probably feel rather dizzy. Instead stretch your arms and legs carefully and genlty for a minute or two. If you have been lying down move slowly into a sitting position and stay like that for a few seconds more in order to give your body time to re-adapt.

Physical Relaxation

Your mind has a number of very obvious practical effects on your body. If you ge angry, your skin will go red. If you are afraid, your skin will go pale and you may sweat. Your heart will beat faster and your muscles will tense. Your rate of breathing will increase and, if you are susceptible to asthma, you'll probablyy start to wheeze as well.

All these changes can produce a number of quite devastating physical effects. For example, tensed muscles commonly produce headaches, back pains and stiff necks. If you suffer from any problem caused by physical tension, all sorts of professionals will be able to help you. Orthodox doctors can help you deal with the symptoms of the disease. And if your symptoms are produced by muscle tension, a physiotherapist or masseur should be able to help you by relaxing your muscles.

But seeking help from a medical professional when you are suffering from a stress-induced disorder can only provide you with a short-term solution. It's obviously much more sensible to learn how to deal with your symptoms yourself.

Select one of the following techniques

Take slow, deep breaths. Anger or fear will make you breathe faster. Tou can, however, soothe your mind by deliberately taking slower, deeper breaths. If you are anxious because you are about to make a public speech, try taking long, slow, deep breaths. You'll find that your anxiety will be kept under control.
Keep your voice as low as you can. Anger and other emotions often make you want to shout. sometimes you must let your anger out. But if that is totally inappropriate, whisper - and you'll find it difficult to stay angry.
Learn to relax your muscles. When you are angry or upset, your muscles will become tense. That tension wiill then produce symptoms like muscle pains and headaches. you can deal with those symptoms and help reduce the tension in your mind by deliberately relaxing your body.
Remember that tiring physical work can be extremely relaxing. Do not overdo things, of course. You must stop as soon as your muscles begin to ache. It is possible to ease the troubled mind by simple physical exertion.
Muscles which are tensed and sore can be eased by simple massage - and the soothing effect thatt the massage has on the muscles will also soothe the mind (The link between the mind and the body is the close one: a tense mind can produce tense muscles, and soothed relaxed muscles can also produce a relaxed, soothed mind.) You can massage your own feet, legs and arms and may even be able to massage your own neck muscles. But back problems are best massaged by another pair of hands. Remember that a little oil will make massage far more soothing and effective as a restorative.

Mental imagery

The relationship between imagination and reality is closer than you think.

William Shakespeare wrote that,

"There is nothing good or bad, but thinking makes it so.'

And more recenlty, the philosopher announced that, iin his opinion too, human beings, by changing the inner attitudes of their minds, change the outer aspects of their lives, and there by control their own destinies.

While the majority of physicians and surgeons around the world have continued to concerntrate on using knives, poisons, electricity, chemicals and rediation to attack disease and disorder, a small but persistent number of researchers have continued to experiment with techniques involving he imagination.

As is well known, the human imagination can prove destructive and damaging. If a man thinks he has cancer developing, there is a very good chance indeed that he will develop a cancer. If a woman thinks she is going to lose her baby, the chances of her losing the baby are greatly enhanced. If a man thinks he is going to have a heart attack, he will probably have a heart attack. If a women thinks she is likely to die, she will probably die.

When the professional suggests to the patients that he will get better, the patient's imagination responds by triggering the release of natural pain-relieving hormones (or endorphins). And when patient duly gets better, the professional usually takes the credit.

The patient needs only to believe in the power of his imagination in order to benefit from its potential strength. He has to learn a few simple creative 'tricks' in order to harness these powers, but the basic requirment, the fundamental, essential prerequisite is that he believes.

To walk a tight-rope, you need faith in your skills, and you need to believe that you will succeed. If you don not have that faith and belief, however great your skills may be, you will fall.

When you fall ill and need to use the power of your imagination to help you combat very real symptoms, there are a number of simple ways in which you can stimulate your imaginaion to help you.

Always think of yourself getting better and try to see yourself fully recovered, doing all the things you would normally do.
Never think of any disease as being strong or powerful. If you have an infection of any kind, think of the infective organism as being evil, but weak, homeless, lonely and frightened. If you have a cancer, think of it as an uncertain intruder, struggling to survive.
Try living your body if you are suffering from pain or some specific illness. Decide that you will move to a far corner of the room and settle yourself down to help heal your body. Imagine that you can see yourself from the front, the side, the back and from above. Leave the pain or the illness behind. now see teams of skilled and dedicated doctors working on your body to remove the disease and eradicate the pain. Visualise the disease as a pile of rubbish that simply needs to be cleaned out and carted away. Imagine that the pain in your body is transmitted along special wires and try to see the doctors cutting those wires. don't re-enter your body until you are satisfied that the doctors have done as much as they can for the time being.
If you are being treated with drugs of any kind, imagine each tablet or capsule as being full of special miniature fighting forces. Imagine those beings released in your stomach, finding their way into your bloodstream and travelling around your body, fighting the disease that is affecting you. Imagine the white blood cells in your body fighting also on your behalf. Think of your fighting forces as cowboys, as cavalry, as spacemen or as mediael knights of the round Table. It really doesn't matter how you use your imagination as long as you use it in positive and dramatic way and as long as you pick images which you can believe ib and have faith.

Some of this may sound alarmingly simple. But that is only beacuse we have been trained to think of medical technology as having all the answers and of our bodies as being fundamentally weak and fragile. As children, we are told off for fantasising and daydreaming. As adults, we are encouraged to put our faith in the professionals. And yet all the evidence now available shows that the professionals have very few answers, while our bodies contain many forces that we have consistently underestimated. Our minds can make our bodies ill. But hey can also keep them healthy - and make them well again.

The Healing Touch

Many modern healers don't really approve of faith healing, however. And healing certainly isn't necessarily mystical, nor does it need to be associated with any religion or religious group. Most surprising of all, perhaps, is the fact that the majority of practising healers do not believe that there is anything particularly exceptional in what they do. 'Healer', one healer has said, 'is not a special gift, it's just that the full-time healers practise a lot and get quite good at it.'

Dolores Krieger, Professor of Nursing at New York University and one of the best known healers in the world, has convinced many sceptical doctors by running contolled clinical trials whicha have shown that blood changes produced by healing can be measured in the laboratory. You really can't get better evidence than that.

Intuition

Increasing number of people provide us with practical illustrations of the remarkable ways in which the mind often operates. There have been the countless stories of individuals having dreams and then discovering that their dreams were very close to reality. The mind, it seems, can work in many remarkable ways.

If you want to use your intuitive powers more constructively, read through the following paragraphs.

If you tend to spend ages making relatively minor decisions - and find yourself getting into quite a state trying to decide what to wear, what to eat and so on - then give yourself a 10-second limit for making your decision. Simply make up your mind to follow whatever thought sprang first into your mind. Don't waste mental energy thinking about it for an hour and trying on everything else. The chances are that, your first, instincitve solution was probably the best. And with fairly minor decisions like these, you haven't got much to lose anyways. The longer you spend worrying before you come to a conclusion, the greater the price you'll have to pay for defying your sense of intuition. Remember too, that if you don't do what your instinct tells you to do, you'll curse yourself afterwards, and probably never be really satisfied with your solution.
If you have difficult problem to solve and you've spent hours worrying about it, give up and do something completely different. Your sunconscious mind will have continued to work on the problem and will have produced soluton for you.
When you're looking for a solution toa problem, try writing down a string of possible answers. Scribble them down just as fast as possible as you can. Do this for 10 or 15minuted or so and then sit down and look at what you have produced. You'll find that many of the things you've written still look silly or downright stupid. These can be discarded straight away. But many of the others will be useful. One of your jottings will very problably be the solution you're looking for.
If you want to try sharpening your powers of prediction, try guessing what are going to be the lead stories in tomorrow morning's newspapers. Or try guessing whose picture will appear on the cover of one of the weekly news magazines. Or try to predict the outcome of forthcoming sporting events or elections. Try to see a particular individual winning. Or try to see yourself holding a newspaper with a headline clearly visible. Remember that visual images are easier to play with than any other kind. So when you're trying thins type of exercise always try to 'see' something happening, rather than trying to think about it in cold, analytical terms. If you try this type of technique regularly, your brain will become more and more efficient at sorting out information and come up with instant answers - your intuitive sense will be improved.

6. Using your mind to heal your body: Controlling positive forces

Laughter

Just how laughter and humour can have such a positive effect on the human body is still something of a mystery. It has been suggested that laughter helps by improving respirations, by lowering the blood pressure and, possibly, by incresing the supply of specific types of internally produced healing hormone. The diaphragm is relaxed, the lungs are exercised (with the result that the amount of oxygen in the blood turning is incresed) and the cardiovascular system is given a good tuning-up exercise.

Dr Paul Ekman of the University of California has claimed that the very act of flexing the facial muscles into a smile may produce a genuine and calming effect on the nervous sysytem, heart rate and respiratory system. Next time you're feeling miserable just try putting a rally cheerful smile on your face. You'll find it difficult to stay quite so sad. Try making your eyes sparkle with laughter and you'll notice the effect even more.

Humour also helps by diverting the patient's attention. When you're busy laughing at something that you're reading or watching, you 'forget' that you have a pain.

Laughter isn't just a pleasant experience. It is a positive, natural phenomenon which helps to ensure that the body benefits to the fullest extent. It may well be that laughter really is the best medicine.

There are number of ways you can add more laughter to you life:--

You can try to spend as much time as possible with cheerful, happy people. Depression is contagious.
Try not to take yourself too seriously.
Make a list now of your favourite funny films and books.

The funny thing is, of course, that when you know that you've got something that you can rely on to cheer you up a little, you hardly ever need it. Just a tonic to pick up and read is enough.

We can't always lift ourselves out of the length of the slough of a cruelly destructive despair by watching funny films or reading funny books. When things are really bad, we often rely on the understanding of friends and relatives. Sadly, very few people visiting sick friends or relatives offer much in the way of positive encouragement through laughter. The average visitor turns up at the bedside clutching a brown paper bag full of grapes (which the patient never normally eats and doesn't like very much anyway) and then sits for half an hour or so offering an unispiring series of sorry anecdotes and dreary gossip. It's really hardly surprising that when the average visitors leaves the average bedside, the average patient is more miserable and depressed than ever.

If, on the other hand, visitors were to arrive at the hospital or bedside with a bag full of cheerful magazines and lively books and half an hour's worth of jolly stories and merry jokes, the patient would be much happier and much more cheerful on their departure. Smiles are as contagious as yawns and even the slightest of grins or the weakest of laughs can have a beneficial healing effect.

Purpose

The truth is, of course, that we do all need a purpose in our life. We need something to hope for, something to fight for and something to look forward to. Without purpose and meaning, out lives are hollow and unrewarding. With purpose and hopes we can survive the meanest of circumstances and the most distressing of problems. Purpose and ambition enable us to live through the worst of life crises.

Begin putting purpose into your life by making a list of all the goals and ambitions that you had when you were teenager. Try to think back and remember what hopes and aspirations fired your imagination at that age. Perhaps you dreamt of becoming an actor, a musician, a politician or an artist. Include all your ambitions on your list - long-term as well as short-term ones, reasonable exceptions alongside outrageous, wild dreams.

Then take a look through your list to see just how many of those dreams and ambitions still excite you. Forget your responsibilities and commitments for a few moments and try to revive and relive your teenage hopes and enthusiasms. Remember the talents you felt that you had and the energy that gave your life meaning.

Remove those unnecessary restrictions and your subconscious mind will spring to your help. Once you decide that you would like to take up painting (and that there really isn't anything to stop you taking up painting) you'll start to notice all sorts of hints and tips and possibilities that you would otherwise have missed.
Without ambitions and hopes and inspirations our lives are sterile and empty. With them you will have given yourself tremendous new powers with which to combat the stress and strains associated with your daily boredom, pressures and frustrations.

Whatever your age, your job and your personal responsibilities, your life needs purpose and direction as much as it needs food and oxygen. You need to be stretched, you need to take chances and you need to know that, whatever you may achieve, you have at least given yourself every chance of satisfying those early ambitions and dreams.

Optimism

If you look around among your friends, relatives and neighbours, you will probably find that most of the people you know are neither exceptionally optimistic nor exceptionally pessimistic. But you will find that most people do tend to be either largely one type or the other. And you will find too that the people who are mainly pessimistic tend, on the whole, to suffer more with their health than thhe individuals who are more potimistic.

Every job that has to be done can be looked at in a variety of different ways. A man laying bricks can think of himself as having a dull, tedious job that merely involves placing one brick next to another for hours on end. or he can think of himself as earning a living for himself and his family so that they can live together as comfortably and as happily as possible. Or he can think of himself as helping to create a house which some new family will excitedly turn into a home.

Try to establish a positive approach to everything you do and everyone you meet. Although you will sometimes be disappointed, you will gain far more from your life than if you constantly nurture a cautious, negative approach.

Through a similar sort of mental mechanism your interests and your memories will dominate your attitudes to other things in your life. if you have an unhappy experience when trying to put up a shelf, your impressions and memories of your skills with a hammer and a piece of wood will be negative. If you make a mistake in a business deal, you will be unsually cautious when you are in similar situations. If a relationship fails, you will remember that failure when trying to develop new relationships. Your attitudes and your memories will affect your responses and your approach to fresh encounters.

When things go wrong, as they most surely will in anyone's life, you should try to learn what you can from each unhappy experience and then forget about it. You should extract what useful memories you can from such experience as a lesson, not a punishment. If you brood on your failures, the chances are that they will recur, eventually growing in your mind, until they reach exaggerated and unmanageable proportions. Pessimists tend to think of their failures as unforgivable and eternally damning, whereas in truth they are priceless experiences without which none of us could change, progress or improve ourselves.

Its not suggestive that failure is welcome, of course. But if you fear failure, as many pessimist do, then you will never try new projects. You should learn to dominate your failures by sharing them rather than hiding them, and by using them rather than by allowing them to limit you.

Assertiveness

There are thousands of patients who suffer enormously because of their inability to assert themselves. They are pushed around by parents, family, friends, relatives, employers, doctors and just about everyone else they meet. Their lives are run by others. They find themselves making errands for people who could perfectly well run their own errands.

They find themselves sitting on committees and doing boring administrative jobs which no one esle wants. They find hemselves lumbered with looking after the children while everyone else goes off to have a good time at a party.

They find themselves working overtime at the weekends and not getting paid for it.

They find themselves accepting dinner invitations, speaking engagements and so on that they would really like to refuse.

In restaurrants, the unassertive will never think of returning poorly cooked meals or complaining when they have been overcharged. In shops, they will buy things that they don't really need or want, because they are pressured to buy by a domineering salesman. In bus queus they'll find themselves being pushed out of the way by more self-important, assertive individuals.

Things reach a peak in hospital. There the unassertive patient will be put in bed, in pyjamas, and will stay there, confined and bound to conform. The unassertive patient will do what he is told to do, when he is told to do it. He will keep still and quiet and he won't ask questions.

Doctors and nurses like their patients to be unassertive because it makes the hospital easier to run. If all the patients keep still and don't ask too many questions, it makes life very easy for the nurses and the doctors. But the evidence shows that seriously ill patients who do not assert themselves are the patients who are the first to die. The patients who are considered 'model' patients and who are liked by the doctors and the nurses are the ones who don't survive.

The patients who survive are the assertive ones: the ones who demand information, who refuse to be dominted, who wrie down things that they are told, who wants to be put into a good position near a window or the television set, who won't accept administrative nonesense just because all accepts it, and who in short, stick up for themselves as individuals. They demand to be allowed out of bed. They demand to be allowed home. They aren't very much liked by the doctors or te nurses. But they get batter quickly and they survive.

The hospital situation is a rather special one, of course. But outside the hospital, the non-assertive individual can suffer in a nimber of ways. As well as being physically and mentally worn out from doing chores for other people, he will often suffer a great deal of frustration and hidden anger. These feelings can be intense and extremely destructive, producing a wide range of physical and mental problems. Headaches and stomach pains are just two common physical consequences of an individual's failure to assert himself.

To be assertive, you don't have to be aggressive rude or unpleasant. You simply have to be more aware of your own needs and wishes and more prepared to stand your ground when you are being put under pressure by someone else.

To begn with, you must remember to be straightforward and honest as often as possible. If you don't want to do something, say so. If you try to offer other people explanations or excuses, you'll probably end up trapping yourself and being manipulated into a corner.

You should be careful not to try and solve people's problems for them when they're trying to involve you in something you are anxious to avoid.

You can also help yourself by trying to put yourself into the position of an outside observer. many people who are unassertive, fail to look after themselves effectively because they are frightened of how they will appear to other people. But if you do put yourself into someone else's shoes, you'll often find that your behaviour really isn't as terrible as you first thought it was.

Once you start standing up for yourself a little, you'll soon find that you feel less frustrated. you'll feel more comfortable with other people too. And, most surprisingly perhaps, you'll find that other people treat you with respect and consideration.

Loving and Caring

"During the last 3months of pregnancy, and for the 12months after the pregnancy has ended, a mother's lips will produce a sexually attractive chemicals designed to make her lips more kissable. Sebaceous glands along the borders of the newborn baby's lips produce similar chemicals and help ensure that the baby responds to it's mother's kisses in an appropriate way."

As we grow up, our need for a close, loving relationship with those who are nearest and dearest to us does not diminish. Childrenwho are neglected by their parents, and deprived of a normal relationship with their parents as they grow up, will become 'harder' and 'tougher' in both physical and emotional terms. They will respond more slowly to signs of physical disress or pain and they themselves show less affection to those around them.

Even in adulthood, our need for love, care and affection does not fall. the healing power of a cuddle has, indeed, been so well established that in 1985 it was announced that double beds would be provided in the maternity units of some hospitals in Lincolnshire, so that husbands could cuddle and comfort their wives. In other hospitals, doctor and nurses will often now turn a blind eye to patients in private rooms who want to turn vising hours into personalised therapeutic experiences. Withot these physical signs of affection, we become more brittle, less emotionally stable and more susceptible to fear, stress, pressure and distress.

There are nimber of simple ways in which you canincrease the amount of loving in your life.

Try not to hide your feelings for those who are close to you. Don't be afraid to tell someone if you love them. Don't be shy about offering a kiss or a cuddle. And remember that it is just as important that you do not shy away when someone who is close to you approaches with a kiss, a hug or some other sign of physical affection.
Try to get rid of old-fashioned prejudices about showing affection in public. Members of previous generations often thought it was wrong for courting couples to hold hands, for young mothers to breastfeed their babies in public or for couplles to exhanfe kisses in the street. These prejudices were based on nothing substantial than an unhealthy mixture of religious gulit and unnatural embarrassment. There is nothing unnatural about sex, courtship or love. A few decades ago, some people thought that nakedness wa a sin and sex a duty to be endured by those prepared to procreate for the sake of society. Those attitudes are outdated and the time has come for the prejudices that there they inspired to be discared too. Learn to accept that there is nothing intrinsically wrong with two people hugging, kisssing or cuddling in public. Until you have eradicated these fears and anxieties about public displays of affection, you will continue to find it difficult to enjoy or initiate private displays of affection.
Don't be shy about touching people - or allowing people to touch you. you may be able to break down some of your own barriers by having - or giving - a message.
Remember that children are particularly susceptible to a lack of affection. Newborn babies should be placed on their mother's stomach as soon as possible after birth. And for the first few years of life, babies need to be touched as often as possible by the people who are closest to them. In our society, it is all too easy for a baby to tspend its days in a pram or cot well away from people. That can be a destructive experience. Parents should try to keep their babies as close to them as they possibly can.

And remember that when a child starts to pay an unsual amount of attention to a doll (such as a teddy bear, for example), that child is crying out for more parental affection and love. There is damger that the child who constantly needs to hug his teddy bear isn't getting enough affection from his parents.

Understanding your priorities

Failure to differentiate between those important problems which need a considerable amount of attention, and the far less significant problems which can be safely delegated, ignored or simply left to other people, doesn't just lead to economic or political disaster, of course. It can lead to wide variety of health problems. Pressures, worries and problems of all sizes can have an adverse effect on your body and your mind and the smaller problems and the insignificant worries can have just s devastating an effect on your health as the major problems.

If you fail to differentiate between the big problems and the little ones, and you fail to establish priorities in your life, you will suffer in a number of ways.

The number of problems you're exposed to will prove damaging simply because there are so many of them. If you allow yourself to worry about the scratch on your car and the missing button on your shirt sleeve, your mind will simply add these anxieties to the other more essential worries that you have. Unless you make a conscious decision to worries that you have. Unless you make a conscious decision to separate minor problems from major problems your mind will treat them all in the same way.
While you are spending valuable time worrying about minor difficulties, you will fail to solve the major problems which need your attention.
Your failure to establish genuine priorities in your life will mean that you spend too much time on the things which don't really matter and too little time on thhe things which do matter.

Learning how to differentiate between trivia and essentials in your life is an important part of staying alive and healthy.

Getting your priorities sorted out really isn't that difficult. but it will take a little time. The following list of suggestions should help you.

1.
Decide exactly what is important to you. But before you can decide which things are unimportant to you, you must know what your priorities are. You must decide what you want to do with your life.
Is it your family more important than your work?
Or must your career take precedence over evrything else?
Is your hobby more important than your work?
What would you do - and no do - to further your ambitions?
What limits are there?
Is having time to sit and relax and enjoy life is more important than becoming rich and successful?
Are your children more important than anything else?
Is a wonderful home in a pleasant part of the country your main aim?
How important is your health?
And are you giving your health the attention it warrants?

Decide just how important money is to you.
What are your material needs? How far is your life being controlled by the material needs of the others?
If so, then just decide how important are their needs and the those individuals are to you.
Are the sacrifices you make are acceptable?
How far your needs are influenced by what you think other people want (as opposed to what they reallly want)?

When making list of things that are important to you, don't forget to include the simpler thngs in life. We tend to think about of homes, cars and material possessions as being the most important things in our lives. They may well be. But there are many pleasures available which won't cost you apenny to enjoy. You will have to be prepared to make some special efforts and leave a little time free from everyday hassles.

Work out how many of the important things in your life you need money for.
And work out how many need people.
Work out how many of the things you really enjoy are missing from your world because of your current lifestyle.

If your priorities have been determined by other people, you may well spend a large proportion of your time on striving for success that you don't really need or want, while at the same time missing out on the things which at the same time missing out on the things which should really give you pleasure.

2.
Make a list of all things in your life that are causing you stress.
Then look through your list and try to decide what you can do about the problems which are causing you the greatest amount of worry. You may be able to delegate some problems to others. You may be able to deal with worries by taking specific action. You may be able to find help or share tasks with other people.

By deciding what your priorities are, you should be able to concerntrate on the problems which are the most important to you and dismiss, shelve or deal with the less important problems.

While sorting through your problems, remember that it isn't stress that causes the difficulties so much as your response and reaction to stress.

3.
Learn to say 'no' to people when they want you to do things which are likely to eat into your time or disrupt your personal list of priorities. If you are constantly doing things that the strangers want you to do, the chances are that the people who really matter will suffer. Don't hesitate to refuse to take on the tasks that are particularly important to you or to those who matter in your life.

Remember too that no one is indispensable. If you wander into a cementery, you'll be surrounded by people who all thought that the world depended on their doing this or that in a hurry. Your saying 'no' occasionally isn't going to stop the world going round.

4.
When you are faced with a problem, try to see it in perspective.
Is a bad golf shot really likely to ruin your whole life?
Is a missing sock going to disrupt your whole week?
Is your career so delicately balanced that a missed train will result in your financial ruin?
Is a leaky washing machine going to stop you ever having any fun in life?

5.
Try to plan your life a little and put your ambitions, aims and priorities in some sort of perspective.
What do you want to be doing in 5, 10 or 15 years' time
How many things that you worry about every day would you spend your time on if this was your last day on earth?
And how important will some of today's major problems seem in five years' - or even six months' - time?

Then decide how best you can achieve your aims, and tackle your problems one by one. By being realisic and taking your problem one at a time, you would be far more successul than you would have dared imagine.

6.
Don't let yourself be fooled into spending time, effort and energy on products or ambitions that are not important to you.

7.
Don't ever make unrealistic goals for yourself. If you do, you'll end up suffering from stress and anxiety produced by frustration. When you've decided on your priorities and you're planning on changing your life, keep your immediate ambitions small and within reach. That way you'll get accustomed to success.

5. Using your mind to heal your body: Controlling negative forces

Sadness

Sadness is our way of reacting to problems which affect us in a deeply personal way. The natural, human way of responding to sadness is by crying. When we are small and unhappy, we cry naturally to make it clear to those who are close to us and near to us that we need love, sympathy and attention: all the things which help us live with and overcome sadness.

Not that tears only provide an emotional release, they also provide a genuine, physical release. According to a number of researchers who specialise in the subject of grief, and who attended a meeting of the American Psychological Association in Washington, emotionally shed tears don't just provide an important stress relief valve--they also help the body get rid of harmful chemical wastes.

In studies done with both men and women, Dr. William H. Frey of the St. Paul-Ramsey Medical Centre found that tears that were shed for emotional reasons have a higher protein contents than tears shed because of winds, specks of dust and other sources of irritation. It is clear, therefore, that crying is a useful and constructive way of dealing with sadness.

However, because crying is such an obvious physical sign of distress, many people regard it as a sign of weakness and emotional instability. Boys are often taught that it is unforgivable to cry in public and they should bottle up their feelings rather than let themselves be seen with tears on their cheeks. Sadly, but perhaps predictably, the evidence also show that. when children or adults do not cry, they suffer badly when under pressure. People who don't cry because they consider it unacceptable end up not only suppressing their tears but also their emotions.

The damage is done in 3 ways:

1. The storing up of tears means that unwanted chemical wastes are not excreted;

2. The failure to cry means that much-needed love and attention is not obtained;

3. The sense of emotional release through crying is also missed.

Most people will confirm that after crying they feel calm, rested in a strange sort of way. and much happier about their original problems, fears and worries.

The conclusion from all the available evidence has to be that crying is an excellent way of dealing with sadness and sorrow. Individuals who suppress their natural instinct to cry are increasing their chances of acquiring stress-related disorder. If you have acquired a habit of suppressing tears when you feel them welling up inside you, try to get out of the habit; try to let yourself next time you feel upset.

Crying is nothing to be ashamed of. And if you are close to some one who never cries, try to persuade him that crying is neither unnatural nor unmanly.

Anger

Anger is the most commest, most fundamental human feeling produced in responce to any physical or mental pain. It can be produced by our own shortcomings, by disappointments, by frustrations and by what we see as injustices. It can be caused by aggressive ticket collectors, surly car park attendants, officious police officers, rude, indifferent bureaucrafts, mean-minded clerks, impatient drivers, thoughtless relatives and unreasonable employers.

Whatever causes it, anger is often physically, mentally socially and economically damaging.

An angry man:

will raise his voice and become irascible
his face will become red
he will fidget and move around more then usual
and since fear commonly accompanies anger, he will sweat too.

Stored, unexpresed anger produces high blood pressure and all the other symptoms of stress-induced disease. The extra flow of acid into the stomach may help produce an ulcer and persistent anger may produce mental symptoms such as insomnia. Anger is so often linked to pain and discomfort that it is no coincidence that we turn the relationship round and describe red, painful burns and wounds as looking 'angry'.

Many diseases are produced by anger. High blood pressure, heart attacks and strokes are all common consequences of uncontrolled anger. There is enough evidence to show that any individual who suppresses his anger will be more likely to develop cancer than an individual who responds to his anger in a more natural and emotional way.

Among the many studies done, one at the Institute of Psychiatry in London has shown that women who suppresses their anger are more prone to develop breast cancer than women who let their feelings out when they are angry or upset.

Anger is a Killer. And in order to reduce its damaging effects it is vitally important to know just how to deal with it safely and effectively. There are four things to remember if you want to learn how to control the negative force of anger.

Accept the fact that you, like everyone else, will get angryfrom time to time. Anger is a perfectly natural and reasonably healthy response to stressful circumstances. It is not sin to get angry - although it may be a sin to allow your anger to take over your emotions completely. Remember that it is dangerous to suppress your anger and to refuse to acknowledhe its existence.
Learn to recognise when you are heading topwards a confrontation and, if possible, avoid stressful situations. Don't push other people into a position where they cannot easily escape without a tremandous loss of face. Decide as early as possible whether or not the subject is worth getting excited about. If you pick your problem carefully, your anger will be justified and possibly effective and you will suffer far less.
If you feel angry and you believe that your anger is justified, don't suppress it all - let it out.
If you feel anger building up inside you and you feel tempted to get rid of it in some physical way, follow your natural instincts as far as possible. You don't have to race around and hit whoever it is who has annoyed you. But you can get rid of your excess energy and anger by taking part in some hectic and energetic sporting activity.

Dr. Sheldon Tobin, Associate Professor at the School of Social Service Administration at the University of Chicago, found thst the nursing home patients most aggressive, irritating and demanding. The passive, gentle individuals who never complain and who always accept everything that happens to them tend to die sooner.

If your doctor tells you something you don't like, make it clear that you don't like what he's told you. If he tells you that you have got three months to live, make it damned clear that you object to his arrogance. Let your anger out and make up your mind to show him whether he can tell you how long you have got to live! (Paradoxically, getting angry with your doctor will often cement your relationship with him. And if it ruins the relationship, it doesn't really matter, does it? If he doesn't understand how you feel and doesn't respond to your reactions, his presence is hardly helping you.)

Some experts have, in the past, argued that it is sensible to count to ten before acting or speaking when feeling angry. It would now seem that this is a rather counter-productive technique. It doesn't stop anger producing damaging effects, but merely hides the consequences and, in the end, leads to greater problems. The best response to anger is neither to hide it, nor to allow it to turn into an uncontrolled explosion of noise and unhappiness, but to get rid of it by making specific, powerful complaints and expressing your anger and frustration in as positive a manner as possible.

Don't be a whimp, but don't be a boar either!

Whichever technique you choose, getting rid of aggressive feelings will leave you far healtheir than if you allow your feelings to build up inside you.

Symptoms of ill health

To certain extent we all use ill health as an excuses to avoid unpleasant tasks. A physical symptom or two can give us solid reliable excuse whenever we are embarrased, frightened, nervous or ashamed. Getting a cold is a good way of avoiding a dinner party you don't fancy very much. Acquiring muscle strain is an excellent way to get out of a sporting confrontation that you fear. And acquiring a headache is a classic way of avoiding an unwanted sexual encounter.

Some of the unconscious links between the body and the body and the mind have drifted into the language. So, for example, we say things like:

'He makes me sick',

'He is a pain in the neck',

'They get up my nose',

'He makes me weak at the knees',

'I can't swallow that',

'I wish he'd bet off my back',

'I've got cold feet', and

'I had to get it off my chest'.

If you are using symptoms or illness as an excuse, you'll almost certainly be totally unaware of it. But if the link is there, it won't be difficult to find. And it will be well worth while doing the necessary digging, for using symptoms of ill health in this apparently advantageous way will, in the long run, produce far more problems than it solves. Your basic fear won't have disapeared. You will still be responding to stress in an unhealthy way. And you will have developed or exacerbated a condition which will have an adverse effect on your health and on your ability to enjoy life.

If you do suspect that you could be developing a set of symptoms in order to protect yourself from unpleasant or threatening experiences, you must ask yourself what benefits you gain from the illness and what the illness really means to you. Then you must learn to deal with your problems in a more positive and constructive way. Ask yourself what it is that you find so difficult to accept that you need to use an illness to hide from it. And then look for alternative solutions.

Incidently, there is one final thing that parents should remember: make sure that you don't overprotect children who are in pain and do not encourage children to associate pain with love and affection. Parents will often make a tremendous fuss of children when they bump themselves. The result is that the children grow up limking pain and discomfort to cuddling and care. In the long run that can easily lead to all sorts of problems.

Boredom

We tend to think of stress and pressure as being caused by too much activity. But inactivity and boredom can be just as grat a cause of stress and can cause all the physical and mental problems associated with having too much to do.

There are four basic groups of people whose lives are threatened by boredome and inaction.

There are those people whose daily work is undemanding and unrewarding.
Replacing skilled workmen with machines has led to a second major cause of boredom - unemployment. Unemployment produces a number of damaging forces, of which boredom is one of the most destructive.
Those individuals who have retired from work but have too little to do un their later years, suffer from boredom.
Boredom is a major cause of stress among the many women whose work keeps tham in their homes. Tied to the kitchen sink and washing machine by a cluster of small children, today's housewife can suffer enormously from boredom.

There has been countless reports published showing that people who are unemployed , or whose jobs are dull and unexciting, suffer from all the usual stress-related diseases. They have a much higher or average risk of developing stomach ulcers, heart disease, asthma and skin problems such as eczema.

But the politicians and the journalists still underestimate the power of boredom as a force. They still fail to understand that it is boredom that is causing much of the stress-related disease in our society. And they fail to see that it is often boredom that drives people to drugs or alcohol. The housewife who becomes a secret drinker, the schoolboy who starts sniffing glue, the pensioner who takes too many tranquilisers, the football vandal behaves in a violent and inexcusable way all have one thing in common: their lives are dull, monotonous, unexciting and without hope. There seem to be no escape from the daily boredome and no hope for the future.

Under the circumstances, it is not surprising that there is no much violence on our football terraces and so much drug-taking in our streets. It is, rather, surprising that there is so little.

Anyone suffering from boredom - or the ill-effects of boredom - needs to add excitement to his or her life. Excitement can provide a stimulus that can keep the mind and the body active and healthy.

If you feel that parts of your life are unspeakably dull and that you need to balance that boredom by adding excitement and colour to your life, do not despair. There are plenty of ways in which you can add excitement to your life.

Take up a pastime or hobby which you find rewarding. Do things that you can become really good at, and something that you can take pride in. If you have no job at all then consider a possibility of establishing a small business of your own. Window cleaning, grass cutting, gardening and catering for special events are just a few of the obvious ways to begin a small business venture withour much capital.
If you find yourself working with machines which you don't understand, and which break down regularly, do your best to find out how they operate and how you can keep them going. If you soend your days with a machine which you don't understand, it will become your master and ruin your life. If you know how the machine works and you can help keep it in good working condition, then it can become your servant.
If you need more intellectual stimulation in your life, or you need the feel for new friends, then start taking evening classes or day classes at a local college. Don't just pick a subject that sounds useful. Find something that excites you and that you will enjoy. If it's useful as well, consider that a bonus.
Learn to avoid potentially boring situations with as much as skill and tact as yoy can muster.
Plan your life as cautiously as you like and as carefully as you can. But be prepared to take risks occasionally. If you never take risks because you are frightened of the possible consequences, your life will be dull. The individuals whose lives we find most attractive are those who are most readily prepared to take chances. If you takerisks and fail, you will at least have tried. If you never take risks, you'll never know what you could have achieved. And you'll probably die of boredom. What a sad way to go.
If you are doing something immeasurablydull and unspeakably boring, escape by creating a fantasy daydream for yourself. Remember: In order to relax your mind you need to create a soothing, calm, relaxing situation. In order to defeat boredom you need an invigorating, exciting fantansy.

This type of simp[le but rewarding fantansy will help provide you with a temporary escape from your boredom. But by providing you with a positive approach to your life and by filling your mind with positive, pleasant images, it will also improve your confidence and self-assurance.

Failing Relationship

Our relationships with other people have a tremendous influence on our lives in general and health in particular. In order to stay healthy, it is clearly important that we understand what factors influence how we get on with other people.

We all behave in many different ways when we are with different people. We act differently with our lovers, employers, emplyeess, spouse, neighbours, doctors, friends, parents and children.

However stable and constant we may consider ourselves, different people will always think of us in different ways.

Our roles in our life will vary according to our own beliefs and aspirations, according to the attitudes and needs of others and according to the ways in which our needs and their needs inter-react. We are none of us single individuals. If our parents described our virtues, our business enemies would not recognise us. If our children described us, the chances are that our employers wouldn't know whom they were talking about.

If you try to understand the basis upon which your relationships are built, you will be much more likely to enjoy those relationships rather thean suffer through them.

Some simple, basic guidelines worth following with all your relationships.

try to take care not to allow the prejudices of others to influence your attitudes to people you have not met. If you accept other people's judgements, you will often make mistakes. Remember that any relationship is a result of an interaction between two quite separate sets of needs, ambitions and requirements. If you accept second-hand judgements, you are accepting second-hand needs, ambitions and requirements.
When you meet someone new, try not to allow your past prejudices and personal experiences to have too much influence on your relationships. If you judge people by the way they dress. for example, you will only ever make friends with people who have a similar social or cultural background to yourself.
Always remember that even people who are close to you will often have feelings, ambitions ans fears which vary considerably from your own. Consequently their attitudes towards specific events may vary considerably from yours. If you expect other people to respond to your circumstances in the same way as you, you will undoubtedly end up being disappointed. Try to learn as much as you can about the people with whom you have close relationships - the people who are important to you and your health. And try to understand their fears and needs. If you do this, your personal relationships will be strengthened.

Guilt

It is an emotion that is difficult to define precisely, but in practical terms it is hard to distinguish it from what we commonly call our consciences. We feel guilty when we feel that we have failed in some way. It is one of the most powerful and damaging human emotions. And ironically, it is an emotion that is built on love and compassion.

Guilt fall into one of two main categories.

There are the types of guilt that result from our personal relationships with other people. Sometimes, guilt can be introduced crudely and deliberately, as when a mother says to her son or daughter, 'You wouldn't do that if you loved me.' Sometimes, guilt is produced subtly and unintentionally, as when one partner says to another, 'Don't worry about me, You go off and enjoy yourself. I'll be all right.
There are othe types of guilt which result from the demands, expectations and teacings of those around us.

There are other types of guilt which result from the demands, expectations and teacings of those around us. Most of us an inbuilt sense of right and wrong and if we trespass against it, we feel guilty.

This inbuilt sense of right and wrong does not, however, come from some mysterious, inherited force, but from social and religious projudices which have been established by instruction and example.

Thses types of guilts are produced by pressures exerted by teachers, religious leaders, politicians, philosophers and pundits of all kinds.

The most important and damaging effect it has is to create within us a feeling of inferiority abd inadequacy: a positive lack of self-confidence. We feel gilty because we fail to live upto the expectations of those around us (both social and personal) and as a result we feel insecure and lose our confidence.

It is directly through its ability to damage our confidence that guilt cause so much physical and mental damage. Because we feel guilty about our failure to satisfy our parents (and others who have expectations for us) we feel a sense of shame and we lose our self-esteem. And as a result, we push ourselves far more cruelly than any slave driver ever pushed his slave.

This internally inspired pressure is the most damaging type of stress. It is impossible to escape from it and the consequences can be far-reaching. The greater our ;ack of self-confidence, the greater our risk of developing heart disease, stomach ulcers, asthma, intestinal problems, skin conditions and the other hundred and one problems associated with pressure and tension.

If your health is being put at risk by a lack of self-confidence, you can use your mind to help your body by emptying it of hate, regret, fear and guilt and filling it instead with positive feelings and hopeful thouhts; you must learn to think of yourself as a success.

There are 10 specific steps that you can take to help yourself conquer guilt and gain health-giving confidence.

If you lack confidence, the chances are that, although you know very well what your weaknesses are, you don't know what your strengths are. You are probably rather timid and shy (even though other poeple may not realise that) and you doubtless have little faith in your own abilities. To counteract those fears, sit yourself down with a piece of paper and a pencil and write down all the good things you can think of to say about yourself. Imagine that you're preparing your own obituary and try to pick out all your very best points. Individuals who are very shy and lacking in self-confidence tend to be unsually honest, generous, thoughtful and hard-working. you're probably punctual, careful, moral, kind, ambitious and unsually creative.
Learn to put things into proportion. You may feel that you have failed your parents because you haven't managed to become a millionaire by the age of 35 but would you really criticise anyone else for such am absurd 'failure'? You'll almost certainly find that you expect far too much from yourself - and put yourself under quite unreasonably amounts of pressure.
Try to boost your self-confidence by thinking of your faults as virtues. Shynes, far example, isn't necessarily a dissadvantage. The unusually shy are often exceptionally aware of the problems involved in buiding up any sort of relationship. The shy tend to try harder - and have greater of care and unselfish affection to share weith their friends and loved ones. You may be rather obsesional. But that probably means that you great attention to detail and that you can be relied upon to be observant and watchful. You're probably often unusually sensitive to criticism. And yet just think of those individuals who are insensitive to criticism: they can often be rude, unthinking and boorish. Which would you rather be?
Your lack of self-confidence will mean that you will often worry about disastrous things happening to you. It may be possible for you to "diffuse" this particular fear by always asking yourself, 'What is the most thing that can happen in this situation?' You'll often be surprised that the 'worst' reality isn't all that bad. Once you know the worst, you can make plans accordingly.
try not to think of every rejection as a personal insult. If the film producers who read the play you have written all send it back, it may very well be because they are busy with some other project, or because they don't have the intelligence to spot a winner when they see one. They aren't turning you down because they hate you or your script.
when you are next feeling rather down, make a list of all your assets--that is , a list of the things in your life that ae important to you-->your partner, your children, integrity, friends, health, country, interests, knowledge, your accomplishments and so on.
Make oa list of all the things you are supposed to be really bad at. Then put the list in order, your worst shortcomings on the top of the list. Then work your way up the list to from the bottom, doing what you can to eradicate each shortcoming in turn. We all get labels as we go through life and those labels are often quite unfair. Labels can often be applied on the basis of an isolated comment or experience or a misinterpretation. But once you have acquired a label, you'll find yourself expecting to fail. Because of other people's feelings about you, you will have learned to be helpless and incompetent.
Try to be aware that there are many people who have A VESTED INTEREST IN YOUR SHORTCOMINGS. For example: Occassionally, friends and relatives will want you to feel incompetent so that they can continue to boost their own confidence by providing you with guidence and protection.
Don't be ashamed of your mistakes. everyone makes mistakes occasionally. Don't worry about admitting that you are wrong. No one can be right all the time. Accept your responsibility, deal with any consequences and try to learn what you can from the error. Other people who find it difficult to accept your apologies are very probably short of confidence themselves. They are particularly conscious of your errors beacause you remind them of their own fallibility.
Accept your limitations, your shortcomings and your faults. Find out just how far you are prepared to go. Then temper this knowledge this knowledge of your limitations with the realisation that everyone else has limitations too. But atleast you know what yours are. And that will always give you an edge.